Love and Fear

The other day, a friend told a story from NPR about a man getting mugged in NY. The victim, upon seeing the age of the mugger and recognizing the cold air, offered the mugger his coat along with the wallet that was asked for. Apparently the victim and mugger ended up getting coffee and talking.

My first thought upon hearing this story was, "Such love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear. If we are afraid, it is for fear of punishment, and this shows that we have not fully experienced his perfect love." (1 John 4:18 NLT) I don't know if the victim is a Christian or not but I do know that Christ empowers us to love the way that he did.

This situation has really been sitting on my heart since hearing it. What if we chose love instead of fear, in every situation? How would our lives change? How would our ministry change?

I recently started working for a ministry called Joni and Friends. Joni is a quadriplegic and the ministry reaches out to those with disabilities. When we see someone with a disability, our initial response might be fear. We don't know what they can and cannot do. We don't know how to respond to them, or how they'll be able to respond to us. This oftentimes cripples the person without a disability, keeping them from walking in love. When this happens, we lose the opportunity to show Christ's love. What if we would choose to put this verse into action instead, choosing the love of Christ instead of the fear of the unknown? To me, that looks like introducing myself and engaging that person with a disability in conversation, treating them as I would someone without a disability, instead of walking away and acting as if they don't exist.

Fear can be crippling. Fear keeps us from meeting new people and trying new things, from stepping out of our comfort zones into obedience and faith, and from experiencing life as God intended. Fear keeps us from growing because we feel safe where we are. Fear keeps us from building relationships.

So what if we didn't respond in fear? What if we stopped giving fear so much freedom in our lives and started focusing on love? Perfect Love to be exact. If perfect love casts out fear, or as the New Living Translation says, expels fear, then there should be no fear in our lives. This should enable us to trust The Lord in every situation, that He is with us and we do not need to be afraid. Even if you are afraid, as I'm sure most of us would be in the midst of being mugged, we can still rely on the Holy Spirit to empower  us to respond in love instead of fear.

I'm sure you're asking what if. What if they shoot? Or with meeting new people - what if they don't like me or think I'm dumb? Or with a new job or new experience - what if I do it wrong? If they shoot, you get to be with Jesus, so it's a win-win situation. If people think you're dumb, Jesus still loves you and is your identity. If you do something wrong, Jesus is still on the throne. No matter how you look at it, if God is for us, who can be against us (Romans 8:31)?

I think specifically of people with disabilities and the ministry we miss out when we respond in fear instead of love. We miss out on amazing children in God's Kingdom, or even miss out on the chance to offer them an invitation to be a part of God's Kingdom.

So I challenge you with the same challenge I've accepted myself. When you feel afraid, in any situation, remember that you belong to Christ, that He is with you, and that you are enabled by the power of the Holy Spirit to love instead. Ask for the Holy Spirit to lead you and be obedient. Finally, watch God use you to further His Kingdom in ways you never imagined.

Simple obedience

In the last year, God has really taught me about my emotions. I have learned that we are to take every thought captive (2 Corinthians 10:5). More than that, He's taught me how to apply that verse in real life situations.

I've heard it said a few times that the Word is objective. God's Word never changes. My life and my emotions are subjective. They change constantly. I have been a given a choice about what to do with my feelings. When a situation happens and I feel a certain way, I still have a choice about how I'm going to respond. Emotions happen without me thinking about them, but I still get to choose how I respond to those emotions.

I'm working on practicing this on a daily basis, but one situation stands out in my head. My principal made a choice that affected my classes for the day and involved me in a project without my say. I felt quite frustrated about this. I responded by standing up for myself, taking on the new responsibility but also taking back say over my classes. I also involved my boss and asked for help. As I started working to change the decisions my principal had made (walking around the school to speak with teachers), I realized I had a choice. I could be really frustrated and share my frustrations with everyone and let the situation ruin my day, or I could choose joy. I could choose Christ, being thankful for my bosses helpful ideas and for the opportunity to practice love. So that's what I did. I still had a lot of work to accomplish, but it all came together and my day wasn't ruined because I chose to follow Christ and let Him be my joy instead of my situation.

In discussing this choice with a friend, a question was brought up. I don't remember what the wording was exactly, but it was something about praying to get to that decision, or praying more in that situation to be able to make that choice. The Holy Spirit reminded me of these simple truths. I had already spent time in "prayer." Prayer is communion with God, whether that be through reading His Word, talking about Him with friends, worshiping Him at church, or something else. Because of my time in prayer, I already knew what God's will was for that situation. I didn't have to pray more. The choice was now mine: would I be obedient to His will or would I choose my emotions instead?

This is something I'm continually working on practicing, but those 3 steps are ones I never really realized.

1. His Word - When we spend time in the Word, we're spending time with God. (John 1:1)
2. His Will - Ask the Holy Spirit for understanding of His Word.
3. Choose obedience - My response doesn't need to be more prayer, my response now needs to be obedience to what I know according to His Word.

This is simple truth. So I encourage you to know His Word so that when you come across any situation in life you will know His will. And then I encourage you to be obedient to what His will is. He that is in us is greater than He that is in the world (1 John 4:4) and provides all the power and strength we need to walk in obedience.

I know

I don't care.
We all say this sentence. It's so simple, so easy. When I hear it in a heated conversation, I try to back off. I wouldn't want to offend someone who already knows. But then I realized what we really mean is, "I don't care." Because if you know, and you choose to do nothing about it, then you really don't care.

Words versus actions.
Until your words become actions, you either really don't know, or you don't care enough to make them real in your life. I know the Truth. I promise I do. I know I fight a battle for my emotions every day. I know that battle gets tiring. I know I get weary. I still know the truth, but notice how all these other "knowings" are starting to take over?

Feelings versus actions.
I've battled this week. Actually, I've been in a battle this week and even though I know what to do, I didn't do it. I can tell you that I know, but it wasn't real to me this week. I chose for it not to be real. I chose to let it sit in my brain and not affect my heart and my emotions. My emotions failed because of that, and I lost. That's what happens when "I know" really means "I don't care."

TV Drama

Changed Response

I've been watching Felicity on Netflix. Last night I realized that my emotions are being affected by a TV show. It came to me when I was interacting with my husband and the way I would have normally responded didn't happen because I had just been watching this show. 

Real vs. Fake

TV is a way to escape from our own realities, and I agree, this can be good and fun sometimes. When it starts to affect the way I treat the ones I love, it makes me stop and think though. The shows we watch may be based on real experiences, or real life situations, but the ways in which those situations are resolved are not usually the way I choose to do it.

I think specifically of daytime soap operas. These are an extreme case mind-you, but I realized last night that Felicity has become a soap opera for me. I'm involved with the characters lives, wondering what's going to happen next, and affected by their drama.

These are normal emotions to have as you experience life with friends, but when I start to experience those same emotions from a TV show where I am not friends with those characters, I realize it's time to step back. 

Unhealthy Expectations of What Life Should be Like

I compare Felicity to daytime soaps because it would be so easy for me to get caught up in the show and begin to think the way they're living is the way my life should be lived, or begin to question why my life doesn't look like theirs. I will be the first to admit, I struggle with my emotions, with keeping control of them and focusing them on what's good. This is the reason I know I need to stop watching Felicity. I don't want to expect my life to look like this TV show. That's not reality. 

I want my life to be focused on the Lord, focused on His Word, focused on what is good and holy and just. These are not values I see on screen most of the time. I am acknowledging that I am a human and that I need boundaries in my life in order for me to live well. I don't want to expect anything that God has not promised, and I want to be fully aware of what His promises are. I want to be fully engaged in the life that I'm living in, the one that He has for me, not one that I'm trying to escape to. 

Perfect Love

1 John 4:18 ESV
18 There is no fear in love, but dperfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not abeen perfected in love. 

When you were young and you did something wrong, you had to go talk to a parent about it right? At least this is how it was at my house. You either had to confess your wrong, or they already knew about it. Either way, there was fear of being punished, fear of the consequences of your wrong doing. 


Get this. We don't have to be afraid of going to the Lord, the greatest Father ever, because our punishment has been taken care of. WHAT?! For real. I know you've probably heard it before, but let me put it to you this way. We all have sinned. It's our human nature. That just means that we've all done something bad (just like when we were kids and went against our parents rules). The human response then is to be afraid of the consequences of doing that bad thing. Most people think that there's a power beyond them which means most people probably acknowledge that there's going to be some kind of ultimate judgment for those things that you've done wrong. But with God, when you accept Christ and come into the family of God, there's no punishment.


God is the best Daddy ever. Ever. He loves you. That's it. There's no punishment because He already sent Jesus to take care of it. Punishment is death if you don't know God. That's a pretty sucky punishment if you ask me. But when you know Christ, when you accept Him and come into the family, there's no more punishment. 


The end of this verse says that "fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love." I don't fear punishment. This simply means that I can go to the Father with joy, that I can be in His presence and know His amazing Love. I'm not going to focus on the things I've done in the past, or the things I might do today, because that's not how He sees me. I'm going to focus on His Love. I want to be perfected by His Love, not by fear.

Your Words

1 John 4:5 ESV 5 They are from the world; therefore they speak from the world, and the world listens to them.

"They" is talking about the evil spirits discussed previously in the chapter. These evil spirits are in the world and they speak to the world and the world listens to them.

The way the world speaks is completely different than the way the Lord speaks, and should be completely different than the way believers speak. The world speaks death, constantly putting each other down and saying words that discourage. The world talks about their neighbor behind their neighbors back. The world doesn't recognize the power of their words so they don't think about the words they're speaking.

These spirits speak from the world, and the world listens to them. The world has a hard time hearing the Word of God because God's Word is Love. The only way you can understand Love is to know the greatest Lover. Everyone gets challenged by God's Word because He calls us to Love. The world listens to the words everyone else speaks because they make sense to them: take care of #1, be as successful as possible by any means, money is happiness. These are all lies, but they are lies the world believes. The world is looking for something to fulfill them so they try these things and they find they don't work so they keep looking but they refuse to look to the One thing that will satisfy them. If what the world has told you is true isn't working, try something new.


Watch the words you speak. When something goes wrong don't assume that everything's going to fall apart. Instead, speak out your faith. As believers, we are blessed. We are loved without end. We have everything that we need in Christ. Be careful to speak blessings and not curses. What you speak will return to you. Speak life instead of death, speak love instead of hate. What you speak is what you believe in. What kind of life do you want to live?

Winning!

I was reading this in my devotions this morning and got so excited that I couldn't keep this to myself. 

1 John 4:4 Little children, you are from God and have overcome them, for che who is in you is greater than dhe who is in the world. - I love this verse. We are called little children. We are still learning, we are still under the Lord’s headship and protection. Little children is also a name given to those who are loved. This is a reminder of our lineage, of our identity. 

The next part gets better. We have overcome them; them being the spirits that do not agree with Jesus. He that is in me is greater than he who is in the world. The Holy Spirit has much more power than the devil, or any of the spirits who do his bidding. The Holy Spirit has already won the battle through Jesus’ blood and we have that same power living inside us. That also means that we’ve already won, and if we’ve won there is a new life to be lived!

Friends, you have overcome! Please notice that overcome is past tense, not present or future, but in the past. The war has already been won. We already know who wins. Will you choose to fight the battles that come along? Will you remember your true identity and walk in the victory that's already yours? 

Rom. 8:37 says that we are more than conquerors. We're not just conquerors, but more than conquerors in Christ Jesus. We've already got it. 

Check out this article and video from John Piper. He's talking more about suffering but I love what he says near the end about being more than a conqueror in Christ. Know that you have power, you have the strength living within you. As a believer, you are incredibly blessed. The same power that raised Christ from the dead LIVES inside you!  

Are you using it to the full extent? Are you winning?